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JWADOA

John Wayne Airport - Dead on Arrival

Troubles have plagued John Wayne Airport of late. Not only are the constant protests causing unwanted attention, but stranger things are afoot. An unexplained mystic stank hangs in the air, and every day it seems something else is falling apart or breaking down. Is the airport cursed? Haunted? Sinking into a tar pit? Dying of AIDS? No one seems to be able to pinpoint the source of the problem, but the FAA can no longer sit on the sidelines, and the airport has been given an ultimatum. It has one week to solve all of its problems, or JWA will be shut down. Now it is up to one man, Airport General Manager Nick Reynolds, to save everyone’s job.

Can this chowder head really turn things around in seven days?

JWADOA is the second screenplay in our "Horrible Movies" series. It is intended to be a full-length feature film, but is thankfully available in convenient book form! Oh, and very soon, it become our first podcast.
You can now read the full book here online for FREE. Also, soon you will be able to purchase a printed copy from our store.

Read the eBook now!
You can choose between HTML for phone or screen, or Audio Book (soon) for an entirely new experience.

 
REYNOLDS: Ok, let’s take it from the top. Problem one: this airport smells like diarrhea took a shit. Problem two: everything here seems to be falling apart. (As he says this, a light bulb above them shatters, spraying tiny bits of glass everywhere and dimming the scene slightly.) Problem three: We seem to be dealing with an increasingly hostile army of protestors. Problem four: If we don’t solve the first three problems, the FAA is going to turn this entire place into a Zappos warehouse and we will never work in this town again. Now does anyone have any ideas, or at least any fucking idea what is going on here?

HAMILTON: No idea. To be honest, this place is starting to resemble my uncle Ethan.

REYNOLDS: What’s wrong with your uncle Ethan?

HAMILTON (slurping at his moustache cup): Everything. He’s in a facility. He’s dying of AIDS. Full blown. He smells horrible, and like every day it seems like there’s something new that’s gone wrong with him. And he even has to deal with protestors too, since he’s in Topeka.

JENNY: Does he have a hole in his sock?
We are actively seeking an agent or a producer to pick up this film, so if you have any contacts, please send them our way.

If you are a producer or an agent and want to take a look at the script, pitch, or outline, please drop us a line: greg@epidemicbooks.com